April 7, 2021

Mélanie Boucarut

And then, I’ll always be happy

That’s what we all think we want.

Fix that problem for good. Never feel upset again. Not take anything personally, ever. Always composed, never triggered. Keep things into perspective.

This is not what’s possible.

It’s not even what we truly want. Here’s why:

  • We don’t want happy when things go wrong. My friend is sick? I want to feel sad! My project fails? I’m ok with disappointed. My kid has a broken heart? I do want to commiserate.
  • If we’re always happy, we don’t notice. It’s because of rain that we enjoy sun (I live in Sweden. Believe me, we REALLY enjoy sun.)

Life is all about contrast. 50% good, 50% bad is the normal state of things.

Thinking it should always be good when all evidence points to the contrary is adding suffering on top of pain. We end up with a lot more bad than only 50%.

What I offer is not to make you always happy (the only solution for that is lobotomy 😱).  What I offer are the tools to really enjoy the 50% good & efficiently weather the 50% bad. To create so much mastery and pride in your life that it feels like tipping the scales 80/20 in favor of the bright side.

You stop resisting. You stop suffering.

You live – and sometimes, that hurts.

But it’s awesome.

No bad horses, only untrained riders 🐴

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You know that I normally disapprove of eating instead of embracing discomfort, but in this specific case we’ll actually go for cookies...

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